Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby Darkandus » July 27th, 2012, 11:14 am

-Yes, Schoolists are actually a thing. There used to be a faction of Sorcery Supremacists but they were utterly crushed in the last alliance between Conjurers and Alchemists. It was pretty awesome, the Headmaster played lord of the rings music over the battlefield and it was voted the best Mage War of the decade.

-Thrones are back in fashion.

-As are capes.

-All videogames with quick time events are now banned after the headmaster ragequit Asura's Wrath.

-The annual summer feast is coming up, the faculty would like to remind you that deaths during the feast shall be punished with extreme prejudice. No-one enjoys eating around corpses.

-Will the person who keeps enchanting people so they can videotape them doing stupid things for gif compilations on youtube please report to the headmasters office for tokens.
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Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby Aldraia Dragonsong » July 29th, 2012, 12:34 am

The tokens are a lie. He wants to eat you.

Everyone knows there are no tokens, anyway.

The Headmaster gains power from drama and trauma.

Show no fear, no pain. They get bored and leave you alone.

A steady diet of fruits and vegetables will improve your health.

That place. You know the one. Stay out.

Maximilian Stephanos has been awarded a grand prize for Achieving Something Thought Impossible.

Someone is planning to betray you.

True immortality is easier than mere invincibility.

Someone is not planning to betray you.
Random Scholomance Quote of However Long It Takes Me To Get Bored of the Last One:
“Ancell: respecting personal boundaries to the detriment of his friends since 1993.” ~bookworm702
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Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby SLAMU » July 31st, 2012, 11:30 am

-Someone who was not planning to betray you, now having met you, is planning to betray you

-The Headmaster, after hearing this rumor about Asura's Wrath, stopped to play the game. Don't think about it too hard, temporal paradoxes tend to happen when you do.

-Tokens are part of an effort of the interdimentional war on socialism, reject tokens, don't let them bridle you into their empty capitalistic promises!

-One of the 4th years exploring summoning things from stranger and stranger places found a dimention where Gendo Ikari was a pretty nice guy, a real family man, and quite personable to boot. If anyone can get him to stop screaming and gibbering, his roommate would be extremely grateful

-making lightsabers is possible. It's also a very, very bad idea.

-You can be beaten by city hall

-There's a tribe of neanderthals riding raptors in the halls. They seem to be searching for something.

-There's a tribe of mongols on motercycles in the halls. No idea how they get them to move like that, but it's inspiring. They trade services for good booze. They trade insults for bad booze.

-There is this french chef that is absolutely amazing, can make any dish and they're a slice of paradise. He's always looking for ingredients, and some of them are pretty strange.

-TROLLS IN THE DUNGEON! Thought you ought to know....

-the trolls in the dungeon have found the internet. We are either saved or doomed.

-A first year found the Blades of Chaos just laying around. In a rare moment of sense, she put up several signs in different languages saying "DO NOT USE", unfortunately before she could dispose of them properly she became quite ill. There's a hunt for the blades as we speak.

-Some of your classmates from your old school are going boating out on the lake this weekend, want to come?
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Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby gman391 » August 5th, 2012, 6:31 pm

-There is a plan to kill the Headmaster by summoning Kratos and telling him that the Headmaster is Zeus

-The Headmaster is currently looking for actors in a play involving a dead wife and children

-Some idiot built a lightsaber with a 100ft length

-Do not touch the beam of light on the eight floor if you value your body parts.

-Playing Iron Man while wearing a Magi-Tek suit of armor is considered in poor taste, also a seventh year called dibs.

-You can bribe Ninth years into doing stuff for you by showing them something innocent to corrupt

-4chan was created by a ninth year

-Creating a Holodeck and trapping your enemies in one set to Arrakis will establish your nerd cred. But think about what happens when you get out. They still don't know how John got eaten by a Sand Worm
"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world."
----Jack Layton
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Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby SLAMU » October 3rd, 2012, 6:54 pm

-Apparently succubi can purr.

-impending zombie Apocalypse is in the cards...and the cards don't lie

-There's a second year that maliciously implants catchy songs in peoples' heads and runs away in the confusion

-There's offers for membership in 'exclusive clubs' if you can shut down other 'exclusive clubs'...all denied, of course. Apparently the nightlife here doesn't care for competition. The Crazed Rave has something of a vendetta against the Pit of Sin after a libelous (so they claim) ad campaign (alledging that the Rave has to abduct its customers), while Madame Odette distains the others wholesale and attempts to stand above them as an establishment for refined tastes.

-So, apparently 3d minesweeper is a thing

-Conjurer's Chess and Wizard Chess are two completely different things, and the 748 AD rules patch for Viziers is hax!

-the Headmaster was caught stealing tokens from the community pot. No one's sure why

-Recent wildfires throughout a series of corridors has started a witch hunt for sorcerers.

-There's an ifreet that just won't stop laughing for some reason, you could probably harvest some tears off of him if you want to risk it

-I heard there was an end of term test and I haven't been to class since September, I'm screwed!

-The Scholomance Gift Shop reports that their top-selling tshirt this month is "I attended Scholomance and all I got was this shirt and some PTSD", beating out "What do you call a room full of dead Enchanters?"/"A good start"

-Would the owner of the talking parrot please come take responsibility for the complete mess of the evening of one Johann Strauss please? Parrot is foul mouthed, addicted to nicotine and speaks English, Portuguese and Cantonese

-Necromancer's scythe comes in surprisingly handy when fending off hordes of hostile wheat

-Conjurer's conference coming up. Batten down the hatches

-Apparently you can bottle and distill moonlight. Goes well as a very light wine, reputedly

-There's a newsletter going around, helpful if you can read past the propaganda.
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Re: Ye Olde Rumor Mill

Unread postby Darkandus » January 30th, 2013, 7:14 pm

Bells herald rats.

If you seek audience with the corpulent manchild, follow the stench. Bring food to placate it's hunger, for if you do not it may devour you, its hunger is greater than humans can ever know.
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